Moms are Moms!

Special tribute to all the Moms in this world as it’s a special day for every one of us. Happy Mother’s Day to all the readers. I don’t think we need to specially celebrate Mother-child relation but we do owe an expression of thankfulness. I am very weak in showing my gratitude towards my mom but I don’t think it’s really necessary. I feel it’s artificial. But I know for a fact that I am there for her all the time. although it's needless to say.But why are Moms selflessly showing love and affection to their child’s?

On this special day, I’d like to share my special moments which I had with my Mom. I may not have a friend-friend kind of a relation but one shrewd observation is that many of my friends are such close to their moms! I doubt my character. I still remember the day when I was affected with Jaundice way back in 6^th grade. My Mom was just alone in the whole treatment as my health was worsening with a continuous diarrhoea and a high fever. She was circling hospitals and taking care of me at home. Yet my health wouldn’t improve. I had to undergo a homeopathy medicine which is one miserable tasting leafy balls with a dose of a superstition mantra. I wouldn’t swallow the medicine as the medicine is even worse than the description I’ve made. She convinced me with all the items in my wish list and finally a very lean, ultra skeletal Kushal remains. She felt awful looking at me and a new diet was made for me. That’s is where the Skinny Kushal turns into a fatso and I still maintain the same body discipline. I did not understand her state of mind then but she really put her heart and soul in getting me recovered. While we are on this subject there is something which amazes me all the time during the whole transformation. While I was young, the lumpy Kushal was found very cute and I had my own fans who used to toy around with my fatty areas. But the same person at 24 is one miserable round object who looks unfit for many things. “It’s not me who turned fat it’s the society who perceives it different”, Kushal shouts. Yet I remain health conscious for a totally different reason.

Since we are hanging around with the same subject, after 18 years, I underwent few medical tests very recently due to a slight mess up in my metabolic system and now I urge myself to some physical exercises and a very controlled diet. My mom really has to work hard in providing me such a healthy food considering her record of the "Tasty Food"(rich cholesterol stuff) and the fact that I have never changed my body shape in the last 18 years. Now that I am working on my body now and let me share you a strange incident. My mom feels that it’s high time I need to work on my body, I have been undergoing in a complete change in my diet. Now my dinner includes only 3 oil free chapati’s with all leafy and hemoglobin rich vegetables. This has been my daily routine in the last few days and looking at it, my mom felt so sad, she would let me have more Chapati’s with a my favorite aloo curry. Although I said NO, the gesture was overwhelming to me. That's how Moms are.This is one perfect example on how moms in this world are made. That’s my confession, Moms are Moms! They are so pure, thoughtful and provide us unconditional love and affection that anyone would ever ask or expect in their life.

Moms are the Best and they would always be. I take great pride in expressing the fact. I’m sure you would agree with me as well. Wish every mother in this world a Happy Moms Day!

Thank you all folks for your time!

Love,

Kushal

Boulevard of Broken Dreams!

Am I Amicable? A Question that haunted me from the last one year and yet I have no answer. The long lasting weekends creep me out with all sorts of disgusting behavior of me and yet I am unanswered. The State of tranquility in my room bothers me a lot. I am preoccupied with thousands of questions which make me numb and outburst results nothing but an insignificant actions which eases my time. The sense of interest in my career, my Job, my health, my family, my friends is completely lost. Sometimes I even wonder how my name justifies me.

This is yet another such moment where I find myself sleepless while I try to regain my lost conscious about me. Last 12 months had moments which I think I can never forget, both the brighter and the harder. More importantly I somehow do not see any value addition. I grew reputation at work which feels satisfying sometimes but more often it never made me happy. The desire of me wanting exciting add-ons has always kept me failed at execution resulting a broken me. I wish I could pen down each and every item but I am sure there is nothing fruitful from it. I am exponentially decreasing in morals and the only thing that lifts me up every day is that a hope which I think can give a 360 degree push.

I always felt that walking down alone in your own boulevard is one phase which everyone undergoes in their life. Most of them will not even realize it as it’s something unplanned. It happens. The only people who find hard to cross this barrier always need a companionship\self motivation which boasts their character and helps you find your way to reach success. But my confused mind always asks a cowardly question. Why can’t I do it myself? I have no vision of future and no control on the present yet I’m slogging hard to cross each day. I don’t need alone time or neither I think a counselor aids my situation. I comfort myself with Time hoping something is going to change. I have no powers to show the world of what I am and neither I’m growing towards it. I disturb my metabolism as it worsens me which deprives me down further.

I am just a toy in a showcase who acts when given a key and sometimes I am not efficient as I am supposed to be. I wonder this is the worst I could be or is there something left to deteriorate. The happier moments doesn’t lift me up while the distressing moments hit me hard. The pandemonium continues as the days pass on. The External appearances I think also have a major role to play here. Perhaps that is the reason I think in my case left me alone but now I am trying hard to save what’s in my hands. I hope that the streak continues as the days pass by.

I wish I was a Selfless soul or a thoughtless body. Awaiting to regain my confidence!

Disregards and Hopeless,

Kushal

PS: This is the saddest of my writings and really appreciate if there are no questions here.